Ok, I know what you are thinking and NO, I don’t mean being able to get your legs round your own neck, or any other bedroom gymnastics you may have in mind. Nor do I mean joining your local swinging group or having an open relationship!

What I mean is finding a way to be Flexible in Love so that there is room for each other’s identity to flourish and grow and both of you are open to the changes that take place mentally and physically in each other as well as the changes that take place in your world.

The one thing we can always be certain of is uncertainty. Things change and stuff happens. That’s the way of the world. Right now, many people are experiencing financial challenges that are putting strain on their relationships as well as coping with all the usual stuff that happens unexpectedly in our daily lives. If our kids are doing well, the car will break down; if the car’s in good nick, someone gets ill; if everyone is well, we cant find anyone to buy our house so we can move. There isn’t enough time for our own interests with all our responsibilities and there isn’t enough time for each other. And the list goes on. We get prickly with each other and become more rigid and unbending in an attempt to get our own needs met.

And we so know that being in a relationship means weathering the storms as well as basking in the sunshine.. ….which in turn means that we have to be flexible.

Rigidity doesn’t work. Expecting the status quo to remain the same in challenging circumstances creates upset and disappointment. Think of a Palm Tree growing on the shore of a Caribbean resort or standing tall in the Florida sunshine. In both places palm trees have experienced tsunamis and hurricanes and yet most remain firmly planted in the ground. Why is that?

It’s because palm trees are so flexible they will bend with the winds of change. They can almost flatten themselves to the ground if they need to and then gracefully return to uprightness when the storm passes. And it always does. Because storms never last forever.

In our lives the winds of change will blow us every which way at certain times. The best relationships survive because of their ability to be flexible in times of change. Instead of holding on to our position and our old ways of thinking, when troubles come, a flexible lover will not fall at the first hurdle. A flexible lover, one who truly loves, will bend and accommodate. In a strong relationship, both partners are flexible lovers, learning to let the storm rage and pass, never resisting – never arguing with reality. To argue with reality only causes pain; but only always!

So how flexible a lover are you?

I am not asking you to tolerate the unacceptable or become a complete walk over. I just want to know if you can accept the unexpected and deal with it in a way that allows you to grow flexible relationship muscles. If you don’t, you are not going to find being in relationship all that easy.

So here’s my invitation to you. If you are feeling stuck right now and pretty much unable to bend in relationship, go ahead and call me for a chat and let’s look together to see what’s stopping you from becoming a flexible lover.

Lots of Love

Francine