Something happened to me over the weekend that made me realize how War is just the global equivalent of conflict in intimate relationships.

I went to the Imperial War Museum in London. Imperial means the ‘supreme authority on’, in this case, war. As we approached the entrance on a grey rainy Saturday afternoon, and observed the very large canon outside beautifully, but grotesquely, built to kill, a real sadness came over me.

Human beings create machines to kill each other in wars that hold on to beliefs that one country, political ideal, religion or leader has the sole rights to the truth and the sole rights to imposing the way it ‘should be’ and ‘has to be’ on another. It’s complete insanity.

And yet in relationships throughout the country, at the very moment I entered the museum in fact, arguments and conflicts and upsets and ‘war’ was happening for sure in households around the nation.

If one person has a point of view that conflicts with yours, does that mean that you have to react firing on all cylinders to defend your position. Is there another way? Surely there is another way, but only if you can contemplate the possibility of letting go of being right and all that being right means to you?

You simply cannot be right and be in relationship. You cannot make the other person wrong and be in relationship – it doesn’t work like that.

As we progressed in to depths of the museum we entered the Holocaust Exhibition. I am still shattered by the experience even though I have seen much of the content before as many of us have. To be that right - to hold on to such need for blame, and to use an entire race as a scapegoat is beyond language.

Only when we can handle conflict in our intimate relationships and only when we can declare an intention that we will always work towards understanding each other’s behaviours and reactions in our own intimate relationships, can we ever even imagine a world without war.

Communication is all we have. Our voice, our words are all we have to enable us to resolve the conflicts between us. When I work with individuals or couples my miracle communication skills really do offer the answer to resolving and eradicating conflict immediately. They are simple easy skills (in fact I taught them to the 12 young ladies who came for a lovely girly tea for my daughter’s 24th birthday today), and yet they have the power to change the way we interact globally. Ghandi said ‘Be the change you want to see in the world’. Please be the change. You’ll watch your relationship go from ground zero to wholeness in just a few words.

Call me today if you want to use the words that can change their mind and your relationship and one day perhaps there will be no need for war museums, especially ‘imperial’ ones.

Love Francine