It was the most gorgeous sunny weekend but are you glad its Monday morning so you can return to work or your usual routine? Each week I speak to men and women who have spent very lonely weekends and are happy it’s over. You, like me, know exactly how that feels, so what’s the one trick for weekends alone that always works? Plan Ahead!
You probably had a good idea by Friday afternoon what was in store for you at the weekend. That’s plenty of time to grab your ‘Happiness List’ and find something on it, which had a good possibility, if you followed through with it, to make you happy. It doesn’t much matter what it is as long as you know you will enjoy it, can afford it and its safe! Not being one to preach what I am not prepared to practice and because I am now writing my new book (the title of which is still under wraps) I decided that it was time to do more research and have a weekend adventure (or two) on my own.
So, am I the only person who didn’t know that the Gay Pride festival was taking place in London on Saturday? Yes, I thought so! On July 3rd, the biggest day of the Gay calendar, I headed up to London to go back to the Jazz club I love and could not understand why Soho was not accessible by car. There were literally thousands of people sitting on the road, drinking, talking, fighting, kissing, and generally having the most wonderful time. I ended up parking what seemed like miles away and my first adventure was then hailing a rickshaw (the most dangerous and exhilarating – no, just dangerous really – mode of transport in London) to take me into Soho. Got there in one piece and because I made friends with the Manager on my last visit, I got a great table and settled in. Adventure number two began when it suddenly dawned on me that I had not looked at the street name where I parked my car and had absolutely no idea where I had left it. Rule No.1. It’s vital to be even more responsible than ever when out alone. I even wrote a list of what one should and should not do three blogs ago for goodness sake. Having no idea what I could possibly do, and having visions of accosting the nearest policeman and becoming a damsel in distress (or at least one in very very high shoes), I told the manager of my plight, which he found most amusing. Lucky for me though he offered to escort me back through the maze of streets and was sure we would find the car easily. What’s interesting about being out on your own is that if you go several times to a place and are willing to talk to people, it does not take long to feel comfortable and for them to get to know you. (And help you out of sticky situations). I cannot give you the courage to do this, but I can tell you that the only thing that stands between doing it and not doing it are the thoughts you have about yourself and why you are simply not the type, or the thoughts about what others will think of you. Those thoughts are going to stand in the way of reinventing your newly single life and you need to get over them fast. What I can give you are some fabulous strategies so you can do just that - please call me to discuss! Adventure Number 3 was actually finding the car and being so grateful to the wonderful manager – now a new friend. I can hear some of you saying, ‘that’s exactly why I will not go out on my own’. But do you know, I have never met an elderly person who says, ‘I am so glad I didn’t take any risks and had a quiet life’. Virtually all of them will tell you that they wish they had taken more chances, played full out and had even more fun.
The truth is that weekends are the hardest times for the single and separated. Planning ahead gives you a focus and something to look forward to. It also builds your ability to give love to yourself. Once you can make yourself happy, you will not accept anything less from others. So what will you do next weekend?
Till tomorrow,
Love Francine
