Don’t let anyone tell you differently. When you’re feeling less than chirpy your friends are the ‘Central Perk’ in your life. They are the coffee in your cup, the best thing since sliced bread and the cookie when you crumble. They will ‘stand by you’ and ‘all you have to do is call…. and they’ll be there’… its so good to know that you’ve got a friend’. (Sorry, once I get going, it’s sometimes hard to stop!). So it’s lucky for me, that I am blessed with three of the best!
When I first got divorced, my best friend Erica recorded ‘Hero’ by Maria Carey for me to listen to whilst on a holiday with my kids in a little seaside chalet in Dorset. She made me believe that a ‘Hero’ really did live inside me and I loved her for knowing me so well that I would rise to that challenge. When I broke up from my partner of 14 years my best friend Susan, (also an incredible coach) offered wise words and wake up calls that put my life into perspective with patience and love. She continues to do so always. Then, when I was ready to go out and play, my best friend Annie was easy going, up for anything and gently slotted me into single life, making it fine to have fun, and still go home when I had had enough. When my life hits unexpected obstacles, all three of them support me and love me, make me laugh and give me a good old shake when I need to pull myself together. Even though I am quite able to practice what I preach to you guys, just like everyone else, I would not be human if I didn’t totally value the support of my friends when the going gets tough. The memories that we share and continue to make are my greatest gift and I love these three women as much as I have ever loved anybody in my life.
So the blindingly obvious point here is that our friends are vitally important to us. Partners may come and go; even our kids grow up and eventually leave, but our friends are there for life and are our greatest treasures. Right now, I imagine that some of you could do with the support of people who are not your family, make no demands on you and with whom you can just be yourself. If you haven’t been in touch with some of your friends for a while, swallow any misplaced pride or unnecessary guilt and call them.
If you have moved areas and are away from old friends, you could do a lot worse than making some new ones. Find some groups of like-minded people (there are loads once you start looking) and get connected. Do whatever it takes to make friends first and foremost whether you are in or out of a relationship and do not neglect them for anyone or anything. The truth, as every knows, is that whatever happens to you, it’s a whole lot easier to get by ‘with a little help from your friends’.
Till tomorrow
Love Francine
P.S. with thanks to ‘Friends’, Ben E. King, James Taylor and The Beatles.
